Khawater Muslimah 3 - Tawba (:

Assalam Alaykom Wa Rahmatu Allahi Wa Barakatu brothers and sisters =)


Allah wants to accept your repentance <3 


"Allah wants to accept your repentance" video version =>   http://youtu.be/5GtClEIyyAg

I strongly recommend this video => http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J6t86uNivzs


Brothers and sisters , This is Ramadan a gift from Allah to all of his servants. Those of you who are sinning even in Ramadan  , NOW is the time for you to repent from that sin. I know it's hard, I know it's very tempting to get back to it. I know it's hard to give up your friendship with those people you've loved even if they're your relatives !


Ask yourself "Do they get me closer to Allah or do they help be go astray?! ". By answering this question you will know you're friends/relatives are which of them ! Don't tell me it's hard to get away, Wallah if you ask Allah for his help and you keep holding on to Allah and you do your very best in getting away from them by keeping yourself busy with your lord in this holy month , wallah your heart will soon detach itself from them ! by the grace of Allah the one that will be in the grave alone and in the day of judgement in front of Allah questioned about these sins won't be them , it's you !! only you !! so by the grace of Allah understand that Allah is the one that wants to change your bad deeds to good deeds and we can see that because he gave us this month as a free gift and from following verse we know that Allah is the one that misses you and want you to get to being in track  =D

Allah SWT says in the holy Quran : " Allah wants to accept your repentance but those who follow (their) passions and want you to digress with great deviation. Allah want to lighten for you (your difficulties) and mankind was created weak" [ 4:27 - 28 ]


Another verse is " And turn to Allah in repentance,all of you, O believers, that you might succeed " [ 24:31 ] 


Also Allah SWT said : " so flee to Allah. Indeed, I am to you from him a clear Warner" [ 51:50 ]


Allah SWT saays: " O you who have believed, repent to Allah with sincere repentance" [ 66:8 ] 

so How to repent?


For repentance to be accepted by Allah, one should go through these four stages:

1- Stop the sin.
2- Regretting deeply and truly for the sin you committed.
3- Return to Allah for forgiveness.
4- Strong intention never to return to that same sin again.

What would help in fulfilling the above four stages?

The repenting person should remember three facts: 

1. The grave consequence of sins.
2. The painful punishment for sins and 
3. How week a person is when committing such sins.

Abu Bakr Al siddiq (May Allah be pleased with him), narrated:

"I heard Prophet Mohammad (PBUH) saying: ‘There isn’t a man who, when he commits a sin, rises, makes ablution, and offers two rak'as of prayers, but Allah forgives his sins.’

Allah says in the Qur'an:

"Those (are the true believers) who, when they commit an evil deed, or wrong their souls, remember Allah, and seek forgiveness for their sins - and who but Allah forgives sins? They do not insist upon the sins they have committed, and they know (that Allah is forgiving)." (Qur'an 3:135)


You know on of the things that I truly loved to hear from the Sheikh Al-magamsy s that he said " If you noticed that your nafs(heart/soul) is attached/attacked it to something that related to Duniya and it has become something that really concerns you then put your hand on your heart and pray (O Allah increase my love fore you, and my attachment to you and turn my heart towards you" 


The Dua of Yunus:

The Prophet SAW said in the hadith recorded by At-Tirmithi and others:

The invocation of my brother Dhu-n-Nun, "None has the right to be worshipped save You;glory be to You, far removed are You from any imperfection; I have been amongst the wrong-doers," none who is experiencing difficulty employs it except that Allah SWT would relieve him of his difficulty.

So, Brothers and Sisters ,If there is ANYTHING in  your car, your purse , your mobile, and  in your life that displeases Allah,  destroy it for the sake of Allah !  For " Whoever quits something for the sake of Allah , Allah will substitute him with something better " 


And Remember what Allah SWT said regarding those who fight their nafs to get closer to Allah ;
"And those who strive for Us - We will surely guide them to Our ways. And indeed, Allah is with the doers of good." [ 29:69 ] 


If you know Anyone who could possibly benefit from this share this video and make sure they watch the video that I shared above = )


Jazakom Allah khair for reading, don't forget to share and to give me your feedback =D

Oh, And Remember ;  Allah wants to accept your repentance <3 

Khawater Muslimah 2 – Holding grudges (:

Assalamu Alykom wa rahmatu allahi wa barakatu =D 


Holding grudges video version =>  http://youtu.be/Ms2rFOL5IS8


"Holding a grudge is like drinking poison and waiting for the other person to die" 

In life, we as humans are bound to get hurt from anyone and most of the time it's totally unpredictable. Do you know why?  Well that's because "every son of Adam is bound to make mistakes/to sin but the best of the sinners are those who repent"

I plead to you brothers and sisters, that you let it go. Because When you hate someone, they don’t feel it . Only you do. It affects only your own heart, until your heart hardens and your vision narrows, and life loses its joy and zest!

Please, put in mind the following whenever someone wrongs you:

**  Always tell yourself : "How can I love Allah SWT wholeheartedly if my heart is occupied with hating this person for doing that to me ,and that person for doing this to me?!" Let Allah be Number ONE in your heart so that you live happily and you woudld be from those who are  described as follows ; [ The Messenger of Allah (saws) said, “Strange is the affair of the Mu’min (the believer), verily all his affairs are good for him. If something pleasing befalls him he thanks (Allah) and it becomes better for him. And if something harmful befalls him he is patient (Saabir) and it becomes better for him. And this is only for the Mu’mmin"]

1. Whatever others have done against you, let it go. Consign it to Allah, then forgive. Whatever you have done against others, apologize and ask forgiveness, and ask Allah’s forgiveness as well. Because just like Allah (SWT) ; [ "who repress anger, and who pardon men; verily, Allah loves Al-Muhsinoon (the good-doers)." (3:134)] and in another verse, Allah (SWT) said; [“Pardon them and overlook .Indeed, Allah loves the doers of good. (5:13)]. If you're strong enough go to that person and tell him/her to his/her face "I forgive you" with a big smiley face and hug that person and tell them it's over and that there is no grudge between you. 

2. Thank Allah for allowing you to see that person's true colors. Since now you know the truth ,the next time you come across this person you would be careful with your words and actions and hence would act more wisely (: 

3. Remember that forgiveness doesn't mean that you don't learn from the trial. Because it would be stupid of us to make the same mistake all the time but with new people! Hence, grab that notebook of yours and note down what you learned from the experience so that in the future you do a much better job in such situations. 

4. If that person is a Bad person and you feel that advising him/her won't do them any good since they don't listen etc , then simply try your best to always include them in your dua'as/prayers and make sure to pray for Allah to guide them =]

5. Don't waste your time by making bad dua'as for them, for example: [May Allah make him/her experience triple the pain that I felt] and such. Because you are simply just wasting your time and energy ! 

6. We must never insult them or speak badly about them because the Prophet (saws) was not a person who insulted or cursed others. It was reported in Saheeh al-Bukhaari (6031) that Anas ibn Maalik (raa) said: The Prophet (saws) was not a person who insulted people or used obscene language, and he did not curse people. If he wanted to rebuke anyone, he would say, "What is wrong with him? - may his forehead be rubbed with dust." 

7. Learn from the Prophet and the Sahaba and the tabieen. I've got some really good examples;

• When Yusuf (PBUH) sees his brothers for the first time and after all those years ,his brothers you threw him in the well ,his brothers who plotted against him time and time again. He said; ["No blame will there be upon you today. Allah will forgive you ; and He is the most merciful of the merciful." (12:92)]
• On the day of Fath Makka,the Prophet (s.a.w.) stood at the door of the Ka’bah, holding its frame and spoke at length to his former persecutors humbled before him, explaining several laws of Islam and abolishing all pagan practices. Then he asked them, “Men of the Quraysh! What do you think I will do to you?”. They said, “We hope for the best. You are a noble brother and the son of a noble brother!”. The Prophet (s.a.w.) replied, “I say to you what Yusuf said to his brothers, “No reproach shall be on you this day.” Go on your way, you are free.” 

The prophet Mohammed (PBUH) and the prophet Yusuf (PBUH), they both could've taken they're revenge on these people who have greatly wronged them. But no they chose not to! For me the perfect explanation is demonstrated in the following hadith : [ The Prophet (saws) regarded the one who controls himself when he is angry as being the strongest of men. Al-Bukhaari narrated in al-Saheeh (6114) that the Messenger of Allaah (saws) said: "The strong man is not the one who can wrestle (fight); the strong man is the one who controls himself at the time of anger." ]. You control your anger even though you have the power to do whatever it is that satisfies you at that moment since you're capable of it. what makes you special in the eyes of the prophet is when you let go of it for the sake of Allah! 

8. I saved the best for the last =D ... Remember that you could end up in Jannah for this, so don't ever let any grudge stand between you and Jannah/heaven ;) ...  The Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) was seated in a gathering with the Sahabah when he looked towards the entrance and said, “A man of Paradise is coming.” At that instance someone who seemed to be very ordinary entered the masjid where they were seated. One sahabi was curious as to why the Prophet had said such a thing about this man, so he followed the man to his house. The sahabi told the man that he was a traveler, and was invited to stay as a guest. For three days the sahabi saw nothing unusual, so he finally told the man what the Prophet had said and asked him what was so special. The man thought for a long time and said, “There might be one thing — before going to sleep every night I  forgive everyone and sleep with a clean heart.”

So brothers and sisters, let go of your grudges today and sleep with a clean heart. Tomorrow the day is new, and life goes on. You have far to go and much to do. Look ahead, with a sunrise in your eyes =D 

Don't forget to give me feedback please. Share ,share and share this as much as you can =D and finally Jazakom Allah khair for reading/watching this article/video (: 


My next video would probably be about Ramadan or something inshAllah, if you have any good ideas do let me know by contacting me via my e-mail address: thegoldengirl157@gmail.com 

Wassalam =D 

Khawater Muslimah 1 - How to change yourself =D

How to change yourself video version =>       http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BToPcnmEtjc

Ramadan is around the corner and many of us want to change for the better, to become better persons and hence better Muslims.

Well I've searched a lot about 'how to change yourself' on the internet since I'm no scholar and no therapist,  and I found some lovely videos and articles that I summarized   in my own words and will be sharing it with you :)

I want this video/article to be your turning point in life so please do get a notebook and note down the steps =D

1. Start off by asking yourself ;"Where am I ? and Where do I want to be/who do I want to be? "

2. Then ask yourself ; "Do I want to change or am I ready to change?" ,if you're answer is I want to change only but you're not really ready to change then you're third step will be to get yourself ready to change. Do belittle this step because it's very vital in the whole of process of changing ourselves.

3. Also ask yourself ; "Is it important for me to change?", because if it's not you're going to stop halfway through which won't do you any good. It would've actually been a waste of your time if it wasn't important to you

4. Do it for you, not for your parents nor for your friends or anyone else!

5. Realize that you can only change yourself, no matter how many people support you and are there for you. They won't change you because you're the only one that is capable of doing that! Allah will help you but that is after you take the first step yourself ; just like Allah said [ Indeed, Allah will not change the condition of a people until they change what is in themselves (13:11) ]

6. This is a very important step, and it is where you ask Allah (SWT) to help you out in whatever it is you'll be doing it, and pray sincerely. Talk to Allah like he's your best friend and tell Allah that you'll be changing this and that about yourself and that you will never make it through without his help and beg Allah to help you throughout the journey. Trust me on that! (this really worked for me when I tried to quit watching Korean movies due to their negative impact on me.)

7. Don't make your plan of change depend on your emotions. In other words , don't make the change just because you're excited/hyped up/enthusiastic about it. Do it because you want to change for example : to have a healthier body, to become a better Muslim in my community etc. Just like Dr. Tarik Al-Habeeb said ; [Don't let your emotions change into projects] which means don't let your projects be based on your emotions. (hopefully that's a correct translation).

8. Remember that throughout the whole journey that you should constantly think of the results and keep imaging what they'll be like, also think of the rewards (: ... Example ; buy a size 2-4 jeans/shirt and place it in your room for motivation or think of the reward you get for learning tajweed even though you;re not an Arabic native speaker etc ;)

9. Well then how do I change GoldenGirl?!  .. well, that is by taking baby steps !

You want to lose weight start changing your food gradually and start exercising gradually as well because taking a HUGE step and starting off by running for a marathon is going to exhaust you and hence will surely be a drawback for you. so start with something that's laughably easy =)

10. Making the decision is the most important part  because once you've made that decision there is no turning back because you'll be telling yourself "I will never stop something I've already started" ;) 

In this Ramadan ,what is it that you want to achieve ? Is is that you want to quit listening to Music? or perhaps stop gossiping? or is it maybe to actually start reading Quran since it's been so long since the last time you actually even looked at it? Write down what you want to achieve in Ramadan 2012 in order of priority and then take each one and plan out how you'll do it and try you're best to connect them together so that you don't feel like you have so much to do. And mainly focus on the 'Priorities' and if it's necessary  then cross the ones at the bottom of the list if you felt that it's too much :D

I recommend reading a great book written by Abraham Hicks[Ibrahim fi8i] - may his soul Rest In Peace - available in both Arabic and English ;

http://www.mediafire.com/?42kxm28kqidoffy    =>  Arabic Version!

http://www.keepyourbobberup.com/law_of_attaction.pdf       => English Version !

Give me feedback please and don't forget to share this article with friends and family ;)

If anyone would like to help me in my next article/video that will be inshAlah about "Holding grudges?" (the topic might change thought) then please contact me on my e-mail address : thegoldengirl157@gmail.com  =D